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TAKE IT WITH A GRAIN OF ASSAULT
(a true tale from the Castro, eat your heart out armistead)

by Zeke Krahlin

8 November 2015

Dear Readers Out of the Castro:

Around 1:15 AM (Wednesday morning, November 4th), I was violently assaulted by another patron at Twin Peaks Tavern here in the Castro. Barely had I set foot inside and stepped to the far end, when he suddenly grabbed me with force, and shoved me across the floor and out the exit. I could not resist, since he is a large and powerful man. It was an unprovoked assault so swift that I had not a moment to see it coming. But it didn't stop there:

He kept knocking me across Jane Warner Plaza, and only ceased when I defended myself with pepper spray. While he returned to the tavern, I remained outside and dialed 911. Larkin Kelsey (for that is my attacker's name) departed Twin Peaks by the time officers had arrived. Neither of the two bartenders on duty did anything to help me, or discourage Mr. Kelsey. In fact, they acted like nothing bad was going on, and continued laughing and chatting with patrons, without skipping a beat.

About a half hour after this incident I returned to the tavern and asked the bartenders if they saw Larkin's assault. They said yes, but nothing more. Neither asked if I was okay, nor said or did anything else to indicate a professional and caring response that is the mark of a decent gay-run establishment.

Larkin is a 6-foot-4, handsome Irish type around 53 years old, with brown eyes and hair. We've known each other on and off for almost a decade. Though he can be a difficult friend at times, he is actually a pretty nice guy, and has never attacked or threatened me before. In fact, I even self published a novel about our adventures together, in earlier years.

Previous times I've popped into the tavern to say hi and crack a joke with him, have never been problematic. I do understand, however, that he has at times been banned from other bars, including South of Market as well as the Castro. Because sometimes he takes things a little too far, and needs to chill out.

I therefore demand a public apology from the owner of Twin Peaks Tavern, and assurance that any bartender present, will not allow Mr. Kelsey or any other customer to attack me...to the best of their ability.

I am not suggesting Larkin be evicted from any establishment, so long as he gets a grip on his occasional mood swings, and stops slandering me to bartenders and customers alike with false accusations that I am his stalker and other bad things. Which perjury has severely limited me from either entering any bar when he's present, or enjoying the atmosphere in a peaceful manner. Also, he badmouths me in public to anyone who'll listen, thereby making my homeless outreach to our LGBT street folks more problematic and dangerous than need be.

For some inexplicable reason I still cannot grasp, almost three years ago he started to wreck our friendship, attempting to drive me out of bars and even the entire neighborhood. May this letter serve as a wakeup call, that Larkin finally clean up his act and make amends, to me and anyone else he has offended.

I now await an apology that I hope will be forthcoming, from Twin Peaks Tavern. As for Larkin's surprise assault upon this very PO'd and long term Castro resident, I will deal with that as the separate issue it is.

Most sincerely,

Ezekiel J. Krahlin