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Permission granted by author for anyone to distribute this
writing free of charge (including translation into any
language)...under condition that no profit is made therefrom,
and that it remain intact and complete, including title and 
credit to the original author.

Ezekiel J. Krahlin


© 1997 by Ezekiel J. Krahlin
(Jehovah's Queer Witness)

     Like many late-night radio listeners, I relish these
spooky shows that dabble in the bizarre, the occult,
speculations, conspiracies, and UFO's...of which Art Bell's
syndicated talk show is a successful modern classic.  But it
has come to my attention that, every time the issue of
homosexuality comes up, Mr. Bell waffles on the issue, caving
in each time--in his own typically gentle demeanor--to
homophobic sentiments parroting right wing KKKristians.

     So one night when the topic of same-sex marriages came
up, I faxed the following letter...after our famous syndicated
talk show host concluded that it would be a "hard call" for
him to attend a daughter's wedding, if this hypothetical
daughter were lesbian, and her mate likewise.  (Needless to
say, my plaint was ignored, with neither a statement on air,
nor personal reply.) 

TO:    Art Bell, talk show
FROM:  Ezekiel J. Krahlin
DATE:  June 4, 1996
RE:    Same-sex Marriage.

     As a "gay" male, I refuse to attend any heterosexual
weddings. This is one way I take a stand against a horrible
and tenacious prejudice in our society called "homophobia".
Not until gay marriages are accepted (if ever), will I attend
a hetero wedding.  I believe that too few gays take such a
stand; and that is a shame.

     Before I continue, I want to explain my distaste for the
term "gay", and why I prefer another word, instead.  "Gay"
perpetuates the stereotype of homosexual as being silly,
flighty, weak willed and limp wristed.  Just as women don't
care for chauvinists who perceive them as being hysterical and
out of control of their emotions--by virtue of their feminine
nature--I rebel against being defined and perceived as "gay".
It is truly a silly word, and one without any dignity.  (And
"homosexual" is too clinical a term--like an insect being
pinned downed and observed under a magnifying glass.)

     "Lesbian", however, is a fine word for the homosexual
female. It is a beautiful word whose name comes from a small
island famous for the great female poet of classical Greece:
Sappho.  So I have likewise chosen a region from ancient Greek
history, and applied it to the male replace
the sickeningly ineffectual word "gay".  And the word I have
come up with is:  "Thracian".  Thrace was a region external to
Greece, which later became incorporated into the Hellenic
culture...a large part of which was Alexander The Great's
homeland, Macedonia. Henceforth, I will use the word
"Thracian" in place of the term "gay".

     I wouldn't be proud to admit being "uncomfortable" re.
Thracian marriages...any more than I would be proud to admit
disgust at interracial marriages.  I have heard your verbal
confession--and that of some callers--to a self admitted form
of homophobia...which is being "uncomfortable" and/or
"nauseated" at the thought.  There is nothing more dignified
in a relationship between two loving friends, than to declare
their lifelong commitment of devotion to each other--be they
hetero or homo--in the contract we call "marriage".  Any
difficulty in accepting this plain truth--be it mild,
moderate, intense, or rabid--is a phobia which, in some
people, extends well beyond simple neurosis into full blown
psychosis.  You, my dear Mr. Bell, are fortunately a mere
neurotic on this issue.

     It saddens and angers me greatly, that our so-called
"progressive, democratic" society is still debating whether or
not I--along with millions of other homosexuals--are criminals
in society's eyes.  To deny Thracians and Lesbians the
legitimacy of marriage is to perpetuate our status as
second-class citizens.  Society persists in defining same-sex
love relations as basically (and always) inferior to that
between a woman and a man.  But in truth:  the ability to make
babies does not raise anyone's status over those who can
not...for it takes no brains to insert rod A into slot B. (As
a matter of fact, it takes so little brains, that we are
breeding ourselves into extinction, by the looming threat of
devastating global overpopulation.)

     In actuality, it is God who makes babies...we are merely
the vessels. "Making" a human being, however, is a different
issue...and depends on not just the immediate family, but on
the community and society at large.  The ability to "make" a
good person is not dependent in any way, on one's sexual
tastes...nor on one's color, world view, or ethnic heritage.
Hence, so- called "family values" are not really a monopoly of
the limited (in more ways than one) nuclear family.  The
values of trust, dignity, fidelity, responsibility, and
friendship are really social and community values...values
for the one true, global family that is the human species.

     So get off it, Art.  Why on earth would you find it a
"hard call" to decide on whether or not to attend a relative's
same-sex marriage? What is your problem...chupacabra got your

...........................................(end of fax)

Note:  "Chupacabra" is a fantastic, ghoul-like creature in
contemporary Latin American myth, showcased at that time on
Art Bell's Web Site and radio show.

Image of chupacabra

   (Click on picture to teleport.)